Question about Lilith/Morrighan

[Daemontruth83]

I guess the one last thing that has bothered me. I have a conflicting relationship with Morrighan, I was nicknamed Cuhulain by her because my relationship with her is like, love-hate , well not hate per se it’s more like wondering if she hates me and other times I see her protective or even showing occasional compassion.

I consider myself a manly man and I guess my biggest challenge with her is not to be an asshole and treat a lot of women I’ve met like crap because I’ve been rejected and hurt , a lot in the past. Etc

Other times I’ll be open and inviting and other times I have my guard up with her.

I just keep meeting females who just keep repeating the same shit that hurts like a bitch showing their true colors.

I’m starting to wonder if I’m already claimed?

[HPSZolaLuckyStar]

I personally would think a really advanced energy being like Lilith/Morrighan would be able to see inside your motivations, why you do or say what you do. I think this positive female entity would likely be hard to insult, because that person would understand you, possibly better than you understand yourself.

I don't get what you mean you're already claimed. By Morrighan? And that's why you can't seem to meet the right female?

If so, I'd say I personally would highly doubt that, because really advanced positive energy beings would understand your need for some physical affection and love here and now, in this life with another human being existing here and now on this planet. So I wouldn't personally think this is any of Her influence.

We tend to create our own situations. If you're alone and unhappy, I think only you can really answer why that is, because the answers are inside us. We know. We might just not want to accept what we know.

I don't know why that might be your situation but I do hope you'll find that love you're looking for

[Daemontruth83]

Ugh.... I just woke up and my brain is processing the information lol.

Well. I got to thinking about the situation. I personally feel it’s not jealousy per se but rather protective and of course “not good enough for you” type of situation because every girl I have tried to go on a date with are fucking flakes and tend always give me that “let’s just be friends for now” bullshit and make some excuses. She has not even met me and already making decisions and of course I had to tell her the truth, I’m trans and not fully transitioned yet. But getting there.

I got a mind of my own. Everyone gives me fucking bad advice “tell her your trans right away!” And I’m like “she should get to know me first as Heath rather than hear that, if we get serious then I would tell her!”. I should have followed my own intuition. I don’t share my personal business!

That’s beside the point, and for some reason the current woman I told this too, seemed open minded at first then a week later changed her mind. “Friends “ it got me to thinking “why do I continue to keep attracting these types?” “Am I claimEd?”

That’s why I asked.

I also another thing I been interested in. I asked a Preistess of Morrighan of my situation too then I told her why I think it is what it is. 7 years ago I did a marriage ritual to Morrighan during a lunar eclipse, that was a very powerful ritual I did. I also did vows as part of ritual. I recall in vows of having one on one type of relationship and if I strayed from her she can snap me back or destroy me. I also put in the bow to be hers entirely. There’s more but I don’t remember all I did. But ever since I have done that, it’s been really difficult to find anyone decent. By the way at that time I considered Morrighan and Lilith separate deities. But I often got dreams of Morrighan telling me that Lilith is Morrighan written in blood on a mirror.

But point is it’s been really hard to find anyone. I been single over 10 years now and all the females I meet that I could have chemistry with ends up being a flake, or desperate and unattractive.